Today I had a guy in one of my classes tell me he had just been diagnosed with cancer. I have never had to have that conversation one-on-one with anyone. And he was not telling me because we are good friends, he was simply telling me because we are in a group project together and wanted me to know that he might not be able to do all the work. He sat there an poured his heart out to me and somehow kept it together. The whole time I really didn't know what to say or think. All I could remember was how I had spoken of him to my friends previously. The things I had said about this guy were not nice. I had made fun of his outfits and his enthusiasm in class; I only spoke ill of this boy. And today while sitting there realizing that he had to deal with something so terrible, I felt myself breaking inside. This is selfish of me to say because my thoughts at the time did not matter. I felt honored that he trusted me enough to share this with me. But it was one of those things that kicked me in the ass.
People move on throughout life judging others and making their own opinion and thoughts about people. But we never think about the things that could be going on in their lives. We never stop to wonder who the person is and why they are the way they are. If the world did that, it would be a much better place.
I felt sorry for making fun of this guy. But worst, I felt sorry that it took something like this to change the way I looked at him. There are these moments though throughout life that stop you in your tracks and kick you in the ass, and this one was one of those for me. One of those moments that make you realize that even though I am an adult, I still have a lot of growing and changing left to do. It still amazes me how people come in an out of my life for reasons.
SO I am not saying that I will never speak ill of anyone again, because we are human and unfortunately that happens. But I will try to remember that everyone is human and has a story to tell; people are going through life just trying to fill the pages of their book to someday finish their story in a way they want. Everyone has a story and I will try not to forget that.
